Pig Trotters

Best day ever. Some people have said that I am in love with control; and to be honest I have no evidence for the contrary. I like to be in charge of when Euan sleeps, by making a lot of noise. I like to be in charge of when Euan has sex by telling women he likes that he has diseases and for the first time ever, I have experienced the joy of controlling what he eats.

We had a dinner party at Jess' flat the other day. After much deliberation, me and Jess' mum decided to cook Chinese food. I'm not great at cooking Chinese food, so it was a good experience for life.

The best idea I've ever had was in the Chinese supermarket. I decided that it would be funny to cook Euan and Iain something that they've never had before. When I saw the pigs trotters, I truly realised my dream. I bought the trotters (£1.82 for 4!) and boiled them in stock for 4 hours. The meat all fell off of the bone (as well as the cartilage and the ming) and then I fed it to Euan and Iain. Iain enjoyed it, of course, and Euan really liked it until I got the last uncooked trotter out and tried to make him and Iain lick it.

Usually here I would make something up along the lines of;

So Euan had pig trotter and he says it's now his favourite food. He has written a shopping list and is going to buy 10 trotters tomorrow. I told him that they only come in packs on 4, so he says he'll buy 3 packs (12 feet) and throw two away. Euan hates things when they're not in multiples of ten. At night he has to turn his light on and off ten times, or he can't sleep. On the subject of sleeping, Euan counts pigs instead of sheep at night and none of the pigs have feet; what a pervert. I bet he masturbates to sleep imagining the pigs feet running around in his tummy.

; but I wont this time, because the truth is far more funny. I made Euan eat pigs feet and I've never been happier.

ps; be careful around Iain; we're worried he might have mad horse disease now.